PSL - Felih and Rihnn go to the First...

[featherfoot]

And it's not right.



P'rihnn is honestly not sure what happened. One moment he had been fighting Zenos - or rather, Elidibus in Zenos' skin - and the next he was here. He vaguely remembers being hit by a powerful headache and seeing Elidibus approach him as if for a decisive blow, but the voice that had called him didn't seem quite the same as before. Was this how it had been for the others? For the Scions? Did his body lie on the ground in the Ghimlyt Dark, soul torn away? And for this?

He looks around his surroundings, frown growing deeper and deeper as he realises he hasn't the slightest clue where he is. There is no place he knows with such dense, purple foliage... and the light shining down on him is strangely oppressive, though he can't say why.

Fortunately he can see a nearby structure, and what looks like it might be a path. He can vaguely make out something beyond the trees, too, so... that way, then. After checking to make sure he still has his chakrams, just in case, P'rihnn makes his way to the wooden structure, looking around him to see if he can spy someone he can question.

Comments

[seasoflight]

Felih freezes. He stares at the Exarch in disbelief, eyes going wide, before his trembling hands let go of the Exarch. He seems to collapse more where he's already on the ground, entire body shaking as tears well up in his eyes, heart feeling as if it's being rent asunder into a thousand bleeding pieces.

G'raha had been through countless tries to save this world, at the cost of his body, his life- his joy. But why? Having to try over and over again... how many times had things gone "wrong?" Was this his first time here? No, it couldn't be. The Exarch knew too much for it to be. Knew what he would do, where he would go, what he would try to say or save...

"H-How many times..." he whispers, breaths shaking. "...h-how many times have I failed you?"

[crystaltower]

The Exarch takes a sudden, deep breath when Felih releases him, eyes growing wide again when he drops to the floor, tears in his eyes and immediately blaming himself as the Exarch should have expected. He stays stock still for a long moment, before going to his knees but not reaching out to touch Felih.

"You never have," he says, as firm as he can manage. "The failings are mine. Always, only mine."

[seasoflight]

Felih clearly doesn't believe that, shaking his head furiously.

"It has to be me. I'm- I'm useless alone," he whispers. "Alone here, in a world I don't know- fighting to slay monsters I can barely comprehend- can I really contain all that light without fail? All the Sin Eaters are living beings corrupted by Light, are they not? Will I succumb to it? Or do my enemies smite me first? Where does it go wrong, Raha? What do I do?" he pleads, shaking, looking up at the Exarch with tears in his eyes.

"You, who have already done a century's work- more! Possible millenia! You who can control this tower and travel through time, with the knowledge of countless changes and variables and outcomes- and every time, I- I must... fail..." Every time, he must go against what was planned, or do something wrong, or fail at a critical junction. It must be- that must be what happened...!

[crystaltower]

The Exarch shakes his head, unwilling to accept Felih's certainty of his own failures. Long ago he might have reached out to comfort him, but not now.

"You mistake me for a wiser man, Felih. I do not have the answers or the knowledge to see this to the end. Any other man would have ceased this folly long ago..."

A pause, and a sigh as he recalls the times he has seen Felih succumb to the light, the times he has been slain. Each time, he thinks on how he could have done something, and sometimes he even does, but the end result is always the same no matter what.

"I have seen, I think, two thousand years or more, and am none wiser for it. How could I be, when so little changes no matter what I do, and yet I try time and time again regardless?"

[seasoflight]

"Is there truly nothing...?" Felih whispers softly. "How many times have you kept yourself hidden from me, Raha? How many times has your secrecy been my downfall? If- if we are succeed, if we are to do this- would it not be better for us to work together, with all our cards on the table?" he asks, a plead in his voice, as his heart continues to break in his chest.

This is all so terribly, horribly wrong. For G'raha Tia to be warped like this, crystallized and a shell of the man Felih had known years ago... he cannot imagine how much has gone so wrong. He wants to fix it, wants to reach out to the man he loves, but the Exarch remains cold and distant as ever.

[crystaltower]

How many times...? The Exarch is not sure it matters any more. It has been many cycles since Felih last learned the truth of his identity, but even knowing the truth and what was at stake brought them no closer to success. Still he was caught in this endless loop of just trying and trying to save everyone, even with his heart so crystalline he can no longer be sure if it is out of love and care for those he protects or out of nothing more than soulless routine.

Is it even possible for them to see this to the end?

"...how many times would you have me break your heart?" he asks, voice barely audible even to him. "How many times do you think I can bear to present you with your friend's withered, shambling corpse, held together by naught but a refusal to die?"

[seasoflight]

"You keep saying you're not the man I knew," Felih whispers, "But if that were true, the thought of breaking my heart wouldn't matter to you."

He reaches for the Exarch's crystalline hand and holds it fast, pleading as he looks up at the other man. "I want to stand at your side, Raha. I want to do everything I can... everything I must. I don't wish to fail you yet again, not when- not when you've..." His voice trails off as he swallows hard, eyes roaming over all the exposed crystal he can see, how the other's mane has turned white from the way the Tower has claimed him.

Raha cannot keep going on like this.

[crystaltower]

The Exarch hesitates. Damn it all, he hesitates - with Felih holding onto his hand, pleading with him, desperate to believe he is still somehow the same person he was centuries upon centuries ago, clutching at whatever he can to prove it and somehow finding just the words to throw him off balance.

“I have used you,” he says, finally making an effort to pull his hand away. “Lied to you. Made a weapon of you… and I speak only of this cycle, not the myriad other times I have seen you suffer through every hell imaginable. Though my actions are undone, and you do not know the suffering I have caused you, I cannot forget.”

He lifts his head, and fixes Felih with a steady gaze.

“I have betrayed you, Felih. ‘tis true that I thought to spare your heart from the truth of it, but the fact remains unchanged.”

[seasoflight]

Felih's ears stay pinned low against his hair, and he leans in, stubborn as ever and refusing to let go of his hand.

"No, darling," Felih murmurs, a weak smile on his lips. "People have done far worse to me for far less. How could I ever turn away from you? You insist you are some villain, but I know your goals are noble."

His other hand reaches out and gently combs through the long white mane his first love now bears. "You can try your hardest, Raha, but you will not convince me to forsake you."